A few days ago a teenager challenged me to a game of chess. I had not played since I was a child but when the cocky teen guaranteed my complete annihilation, I couldn’t refuse.
In the picture above, my pieces are the frosted ones and his are the glassy looking ones. If you’re not familiar with chess much what’s happening here is that his horsey (Knight) had me in check-mate after 3 moves. Then the teen proudly said, “I wrecked you!” (whatever that means)
Needless to say I regretted playing him.
Him and I laughed a lot that night but it got me to thinking about the real pain of living in regret. Our disappointment, loss, or sadness has a way of wrecking our lives.
Some people carry their regrets all the way to their grave. I’ve been by the bedside of dying people wishing they could have a do-over at life. Others just have a certain remorse in the back of their minds. My dear brother went home to heaven a few years back. He had been a very successful business man but he regretted missing opportunities of being with his family for the sake of his work.
Even when the weight of regret is not that heavy on our souls we still keep it tucked away in the recesses of our minds and feel its sting every once in a while. My father in law and I were driving towards St Petersburg, Florida, many years ago. From the road we could see some beautiful bay-side homes with their boats docked behind them. He said to me, “Many years ago I could have bought one of those for real cheap but I hesitated. I would love to have a place like that today.”
It was nothing more than a passing thought but he never forgot that regretful decision.
I’m sure like him and everyone else I know of, you too may be holding a certain guilt (or few of them) that makes your heart heavy and your sigh deep. Don’t allow it to suck the life out of you.
I tweeted yesterday, ‘There’s nothing you can do today that can change your past but there’s everything you can do to change your future.’'There's nothing you can do today that can change your past but there's everything you can do to change your future.' Share on X
There’s a great Bible verse to help those of us keeping tight a grip on regret,
“I leave the past behind and with hands outstretched to whatever lies ahead I go straight for the goal” (Philippians 3:13b, PHILLIPS)
The apostle Paul was obviously reaching, stretching for whatever was ahead of him that God was bringing his way. My pastor, Jim Henry, used to say something like, “I want to invest all I can into God and heaven now so I don’t miss any of the blessings God has in-store for me later and in heaven.”
Think about it, there’s so much ahead: memories yet to be made, experiences yet to be accomplished, cool sights yet to be seen, belly-aching laughs yet to be enjoyed, victories yet to be celebrated, sweet times with our loved ones yet to be savored… the near future is filled with ‘YETS’.
Living with regret is tragic. It can squeeze the joy out of life but don’t let it, you’ve got too much to live for. Stop looking at the rear view mirror of your life and focus on what’s ahead.
Think about it, looking at life through the flawed lens of regret is like trying to eat a delicious meal with a chipped tooth, you can’t really enjoy that which is right in front of you.
Whatever’s in the past, it’s in the past. Leave it there and move on.
By the way, after I was wrecked and feeling sorry for playing that chess game I found out the kid had made up a game rule that kept me from killing his horsey. But it’s all good. We played again and my queen and her minions (pawns) slaughtered his king. Boo-ya!
What’s your thought?
YET’s to come! That’s what we all should live for. I believe we all suffer past regrets or grief, and tend to dwell upon them (some more often than others). I try to ride out of the funk by remembering my many life blessings. God is good – God is forgiving – God is forever. Thanks Jorge. We need to imagine all your future – “yets to come”.
Great advice, Paul, blessings always outweigh past regrets and grief, we tend to forget that.
Sound advice, Jorge! We can bog ourselves down with thoughts like: “If only I had done this” or “I wish I had said that”. Regrets are like an anchor that’s really stuck in the mud. If you want to move your boat (get on with your life), you have to break the hold that regrets have on you, pull up your anchor, and set sail to whatever lies ahead. And knowing that God is steering your course gives you the courage and confidence to face anything in front of you!
Thanks, Jim. ‘Anchor that stuck in the mud’ lol, great analogy!
So true. Leave the regrets behind, look towards God, smooth sailing ahead.
LOL, Boo-ya oh yes sir I love it. I think you’re right we all need to come to terms with our regrets. For years I had regrets consuming me in a worse kind of way. I finally gave it over to God an left it there, after that He did a great miracle, He took care of that regret and I can’t stop praising Him for giving back to me what I thought I had lost forever. To God be the Glory.
Great story/testimony, Pat! The Lord takes care of us like none other.